Ready?
Here we go:
196.8
Weight gain: 1.2
% Body Weight gained: 0.6
Fuck.
I'm fat and I hate myself. I know everyone says to ixnay the elfsay atehay, but dude.. the difference between WOO HOO! LOOK AT ME! and Die you fat bitch appears to be all of ten pounds.
How depressing is it that I can't manage to keep ten pounds lighter?
Fuck.
How did you do?
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Friday, May 26, 2006
Who I Want to Be
By Krissy Poopyhands
I want to be someone who can sit down and eat until I am full, and then stop.
I want to be someone who enjoys working out and is content to find four or five hours in a week to get out there and run.
I want to be someone who looks healthy. Who is able to project the overall effect of being generally fit.
I want to be someone who can walk into a Gap or Express and try on some clothes and have them fit. They don't have to be smalls, and they don't have to look good, they just have to zipper.
My brother-in-law is getting married a year from this coming July or August. His bride is adorable and teeny and he is thin. They are healthy vegan-types and are incredibly cool. I'm not, peeps, NOT going to the UK looking like this next year. Next to all the people in London I'll look like a beached whale.
I thought I'd put together a list of pictures that might help me keep in mind what I'd like to look like. Dresses that I'd like to be able to wear. On my first sweep through Google, this is what I came up with:
I made this sweep a few weeks ago, playing with my imagination and hoping that I'd look a certain way. Upon reflection today I realized that I'm an idiot. If I lost every bit of fat on my body I wouldn't look like these women. When I'm fit, I'm not little. I'm muscular. The boobies! The Butt! It wouldn't look like these women do, no matter how infatuated I am with the wraithy gorgeousness of Cate Blanchett.
So I'm on a mission today to collect more realistic images of women I might resemble more if I became the sort of person who ate reasonable portions; stopped when she was full; and excercised regularly.
I'm going to be thinner when I get to London, peeps, because there are going to be baby Ts and clothes to try on. I'm not shopping in no UK fat lady stores.
P.S. - Doesn't Carrie Fisher look awful from the waist down in that photo? It's like normal torso than eeeny beeny legs. And her calves are about the thickness of her wrists. Ewwwwwwwwwwwww.
I want to be someone who can sit down and eat until I am full, and then stop.
I want to be someone who enjoys working out and is content to find four or five hours in a week to get out there and run.
I want to be someone who looks healthy. Who is able to project the overall effect of being generally fit.
I want to be someone who can walk into a Gap or Express and try on some clothes and have them fit. They don't have to be smalls, and they don't have to look good, they just have to zipper.
My brother-in-law is getting married a year from this coming July or August. His bride is adorable and teeny and he is thin. They are healthy vegan-types and are incredibly cool. I'm not, peeps, NOT going to the UK looking like this next year. Next to all the people in London I'll look like a beached whale.
I thought I'd put together a list of pictures that might help me keep in mind what I'd like to look like. Dresses that I'd like to be able to wear. On my first sweep through Google, this is what I came up with:
I made this sweep a few weeks ago, playing with my imagination and hoping that I'd look a certain way. Upon reflection today I realized that I'm an idiot. If I lost every bit of fat on my body I wouldn't look like these women. When I'm fit, I'm not little. I'm muscular. The boobies! The Butt! It wouldn't look like these women do, no matter how infatuated I am with the wraithy gorgeousness of Cate Blanchett.
So I'm on a mission today to collect more realistic images of women I might resemble more if I became the sort of person who ate reasonable portions; stopped when she was full; and excercised regularly.
I'm going to be thinner when I get to London, peeps, because there are going to be baby Ts and clothes to try on. I'm not shopping in no UK fat lady stores.
P.S. - Doesn't Carrie Fisher look awful from the waist down in that photo? It's like normal torso than eeeny beeny legs. And her calves are about the thickness of her wrists. Ewwwwwwwwwwwww.
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Wednesday Weigh In
Ready?
Here we go:
195.6
Weight gain: 1.2
% Body Weight gained: 0.6
It was a crap week that involved sitting around for long periods of time and pigging out on ice cream and cookies and other crap. I have been feeling awful, and there's something satisfying about my outside looking like my inside feels. Isn't that sick?
I need to keep at it. I need to cut out the sugar again. The sugar is a worse addiction than anything else I've ever encountered. Uck.
How was your week? Did you avoid the pit that I fell into?
Here we go:
195.6
Weight gain: 1.2
% Body Weight gained: 0.6
It was a crap week that involved sitting around for long periods of time and pigging out on ice cream and cookies and other crap. I have been feeling awful, and there's something satisfying about my outside looking like my inside feels. Isn't that sick?
I need to keep at it. I need to cut out the sugar again. The sugar is a worse addiction than anything else I've ever encountered. Uck.
How was your week? Did you avoid the pit that I fell into?
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Wednesday Weigh In
Ready?
Here we go:
194.4
Weight loss: -.8
% Body Weight lost: 0.4
So the runNANG and walking appears to have helped, because I certainly haven't been laying off the crap food the way I should.
How are you doing this week, peeps?
Here we go:
194.4
Weight loss: -.8
% Body Weight lost: 0.4
So the runNANG and walking appears to have helped, because I certainly haven't been laying off the crap food the way I should.
How are you doing this week, peeps?
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
We Were Run-NING
How the hell do you ever hear it any other way if you've seen Forest Gump? Run-NANG.
Anyhow, the Troublemaker convinced me to go to the gym yesterday and we were run-NANG. It was far too hard to do, good lord it doesn't take long to get out of shape does it? But we did it. I walked/ran two miles. I also brought my stuff to go runNANG today at lunch.
Originally my goal was to try and work up a sweat for 30 minutes every day. That kind of got lost behind the cake and the fork, if you know what I mean. But it's time to get back on the wagon!
AgAIN.
Ugh.
Anyhow, the Troublemaker convinced me to go to the gym yesterday and we were run-NANG. It was far too hard to do, good lord it doesn't take long to get out of shape does it? But we did it. I walked/ran two miles. I also brought my stuff to go runNANG today at lunch.
Originally my goal was to try and work up a sweat for 30 minutes every day. That kind of got lost behind the cake and the fork, if you know what I mean. But it's time to get back on the wagon!
AgAIN.
Ugh.
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Ready?
Here we go:
195.2
Weight loss: +.4
% Body Weight gained: 0.2
Look, I appear to have given up at some point during this process. This week I'm going to try and get back on board. You all help me so much by talking to me and telling me how you're doing. Don't disappear!
Where are you, peeps? How are you doing?
Here we go:
195.2
Weight loss: +.4
% Body Weight gained: 0.2
Look, I appear to have given up at some point during this process. This week I'm going to try and get back on board. You all help me so much by talking to me and telling me how you're doing. Don't disappear!
Where are you, peeps? How are you doing?
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Wednesday Weigh In
Ready?
Here we go:
194.8
Weight loss: +1
% Body Weight gained: 0.5
Happy Anniversary to me! Guh. I hate this, I really do. I hate my body and would be just fine digging out the icky bits. WITH A SPORK.
How did you do this week?
Here we go:
194.8
Weight loss: +1
% Body Weight gained: 0.5
Happy Anniversary to me! Guh. I hate this, I really do. I hate my body and would be just fine digging out the icky bits. WITH A SPORK.
How did you do this week?
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
A Giant Step!
In exactly the wrong direction.
There are a thousand excuses for it, peeps, up to and including the Happy Anniversary sheet cake that was oh-so-delicious, but I do NOT want to step on that scale tomorrow. No no no no.
I'll do it, because I love you, but I want you to know that I'm feeling very sorry for myself and put-upon by all this. What kind of universe is it where I have to learn to not eat half a sheet cake??? The crappy kind, that's what.
The Troublemaker says that the only losing is if I give up. So I'm going to keep trying. Again. I'm getting tired of trying, but I'm also not going to die of a heart attack at 40. Period.
Damn, this is tough.
BACK, FOUL SCALE! BACK!
Anyone else out there afraid?
There are a thousand excuses for it, peeps, up to and including the Happy Anniversary sheet cake that was oh-so-delicious, but I do NOT want to step on that scale tomorrow. No no no no.
I'll do it, because I love you, but I want you to know that I'm feeling very sorry for myself and put-upon by all this. What kind of universe is it where I have to learn to not eat half a sheet cake??? The crappy kind, that's what.
The Troublemaker says that the only losing is if I give up. So I'm going to keep trying. Again. I'm getting tired of trying, but I'm also not going to die of a heart attack at 40. Period.
Damn, this is tough.
BACK, FOUL SCALE! BACK!
Anyone else out there afraid?
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