Look, I don't want to post here. I don't want to have to lose weight. I don't want to do any of this.
We finally got our recumbant bike in so on Friday TT and I added that to our excercise routine. It was good. On Saturday I managed to get time in ten minute intervals between getting Wallace down for a nap to run on the treadmill. Or rather, not getting him down.
So I'm doing okay with the excercising.
Yesterday I didn't feel like it, but we've been battling colds. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. Tonight I'll get off my ass.
The food, not so good. Doing perfectly crappily potty with the food, in fact. I'm trying to do better and include more veg and fruit, but really now that I'm working out I'm just a hungry hungry hippo.
Also, because the muscles are going on (this is what my body does: "Oh? We're moving? Must be time to plow the fields!" *BLAM*) the weight on the scale has been going up as well. My face looks thinner and I'm infinately more toned than I was two weeks ago, and what the scale says is that I'm fatter. FATTER? AFTER ALL THIS?
I know I'm not supposed to care, but I do. I'm not supposed to be that shallow, but I am.
I'm also tired of trying to find the space and energy for this with everything that's going on, not the least of which a three year old who has decided he's fourteen and going to make my life fucking crazy.
I'll get on the treadmill tonight. I won't eat at the computer. I'll eat a vegetable at dinner.
Today, that is all I can promise you.
Stupid fucking accountability.
1 comment:
I hear you. I've been struggling so much with trying to keep some semblance of dignity in my eating lately.
Last week I started puking on Saturday and didn't stop until Friday. And I STILL managed to gain weight somehow... that's talent for you!
I so want some chocolate right now, it's all I can do to stop myself from going to the store. Hmph.
Hang in there (and good for you RE the bike!)
- Kate
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