I have a lot to tell you (which is what I'm flash-posting everywhere), but right now I'm still all jetlagged. What I did want to say is that my vacation against self-weirdness and hate was a total success. I put on dresses every day and wore makeup. I look worse in the photos that I've seen from the trip than I felt. Actually, throughout the thing I felt pretty damned good! I relaxed and enjoyed myself and my husband and my kid.
So what if I was fatter than I felt? So what if everyone else around me weighed less? I still dressed well, I acted young and flirty, I held myself with pride. My husband sure seemed to like it and that's all I need to say about that.
The super-de-duper dress worked a treat and I'll be posting photos of it over at Speckblog soon. It made my tits look awesome, if I do say so myself.
I also danced for five hours on Friday night. I got down. I sweated sheets of sweat and jumped around and shook my hair and I'm sure there are 6000 photos out there of me looking jiggly and stupid and many-chinned, but man did I feel amazing. Everyone wanted to dance with me. Everyone wanted my picture and I don't think that it was because I looked so amazingly stupid. At least, not too often.
I felt wonderful.
Then, on the way to work today I discovered that I suddenly began hating myself.
Ah. The culprit emerges.
Suddenly I know what's causing most of my self-esteem issues and I am very, very happy that I'm working on a new career.
Life is good. Look for dress pics because they are on their way.
I look wonderful, and so do you. Trust me. Nothing is as attractive as self-esteem.
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